Anxiety

Why am I so anxious?

There are two common questions people have when they come to see me. You might be wondering these same things. First and foremost, why am I so anxious? And secondly, how do I get rid of it?

I’ve helped countless people live their lives anxiety free, and quite frankly I have a 100% success rate. I can’t make any promises, but my goal in working together with you is to actually resolve your anxiety so you can start living your life to the fullest, because anxiety can ruin almost every aspect of your life.

If you have anxiety, you may find it difficult to..

Make friends
Apply for a job
Be yourself
Feel calm
Live in the moment
Leave your house
Speak your mind
Excel at work
Pursue your dreams
Find a partner
Feel good in your relationships

Then there's the physical symptoms

Muscle tightness
Feeling shaky
Sick feeling
Increased heart rate
Flushed face
Nervous sweats
Headaches
Nail biting
Overactive bladder
Fatigue

And your mental health starts to decline

Negative thinking
Poor memory
Comparing yourself
Avoidance
Overthinking
Difficulty sleeping
Looping thoughts
Nail biting
Chronic worry

Wouldn’t it be amazing not to deal with all that?

This is my philosophy, and I hope I can get you onboard with this way of thinking too. Anxiety is not permanent. It’s not who you are, and you are not stuck this way. You could be living your life as your most authentic self, calm and free, doing what you most want to do and loving every moment of it. You shouldn’t have to be living with anxiety!

I get it, because I was anxious too. I know what it feels like, I know what causes it, and I also know what works to resolve it. So to start, I want to share with you what’s going on in an anxious person’s brain.

Here's what's happening

Fear response

Anxiety is a fear response, and our fear response is regulated by our subconscious. This is the same part of your brain that would have you pulling your hand away from something hot, or swerving your car at the last minute to avoid a collision. It’s essentially the reflexive part of the brain that activates the “fight or flight” response.

Coping mechanisms

Coping mechanisms often form when we can't find reasonable solutions to difficult situations. If we feel there's no way forward or that we've tried everything, the lack of rational solutions can lead to irrational solutions. An irrational solution can become stored in our minds as a helpful solution for similar situations in the future. (Even when it’s not actually helpful.)

Defense mechanism

Defense mechanisms allow us to react quickly to physical, mental or perceived threats. This can be very helpful, or it can become a bit messy when in combination with our coping mechanisms.

For example if a person copes by: people pleasing, 'what if' thinking, or avoiding conflict, anything that challenges these coping mechanisms can cause a defense mechanism to trigger. That might look like anger, panic, self-isolation, freezing, or bursting into tears. The main reason is, if anything challenges what you believe gives you safety, it's perceived as a threat.

It's a lot to carry around, and it's exhausting.

It's all about safety

Everything comes full circle, and it makes the perfect recipe for anxiety. It’s a looping combination of perceived threat, the way we subconsciously cope with that threat, and the mental and physical ways we respond to it.

Our brains are naturally wired to keep us safe, and our fear responses, defense mechanisms, and coping mechanisms are all uniquely designed from our environment to ensure our survival. It’s all stored and regulated in the subconscious, so we’re primed and ready to use that information quickly. The good news is, your brain is functioning exactly how it’s supposed to.

The issue lies here:

If you’re experiencing anxiety, somewhere along the way your mind made a connection between lack of safety, and what’s making you feel anxious. This can sometimes be really obscure and not obvious at all, because our subconscious mind is not logical, it’s automatic, instinctual, and based on feeling. This is why you can’t explain to yourself consciously “I don’t need to feel anxious,” and have the anxiety go away.

The interesting thing is, even if our environment improves, these safety features don’t magically disappear. Therapeutic intervention is often required to ‘calm down’ the defense systems. With standard therapy methods you may notice a reduction, but there’s a lot of conscious work that goes into it and it can take years, because anxiety isn’t conscious, it’s subconscious.

In order to resolve your anxiety, we’ll work with your subconscious, right at the source of the anxiety, so can have noticeable and lasting results. Working together with you, we can effectively figure out what your subconscious is doing, help you make sense of it, and ideally, remove it.

No more outdated coping mechanisms, confusing fear responses, or unhelpful triggers. Majority of my clients notice huge changes in the first week!

Curious how you can experience these positive changes for yourself?

Your reasons for being anxious are going to be unique to you. Many people, especially those with generalized anxiety, often feel everything makes them anxious, when really it’s not everything. It’s something. Knowing precisely what that something is, makes it feel tangible, and reasonable, and it makes it make sense.

Once it makes sense, releasing the anxiety becomes natural, because your natural state is anxiety free! Permanent changes start from this point of understanding, and it keeps getting better and better from there.

It leads back to some very important questions

Why are you anxious?
Where did your anxiety begin in the first place?
What does your mind believe it’s protecting you from?
What coping mechanisms are interfering with your life?
Who are you without anxiety?
Do you really need those defense mechanisms anymore?
What’s the truth about your life now?

This is what makes anxiety truly individual, because the answer to these question is going to be different for everyone. There’s a reason you feel anxious, and that reason is unique to you. Wouldn’t it be amazing to know why your mind is doing that? I can help.

You can know the answers, and you can be free from anxiety. It’s incredible how quickly your life can change for the better when you have these answers!

There’s a whole lot more that goes into a therapy session. I’ll be working together with you throughout the month and guiding you in better understanding your psychology, letting go of unhelpful coping mechanisms, and providing a fresh and positive mental perspective.

There are no absolutes when it comes to therapy, but I can almost guarantee you, if you decide to take the leap, I can help you be free from anxiety for good. The RTT therapy method worked for me, it’s worked for every client I’ve worked with, and I’m confident I can help you too.

Here's what the process looks like

I’ll meet you in a free 20minute consultation, provide you a free assessment and estimate, and you can ask me any questions you may have.

Before we begin your anxiety session, I’ll provide you a relaxation recording to listen to daily for about 5 days. The recording is going to help you get used to my voice, and feel what it’s like to be more subconscious and in the moment.

You’ll be working directly with me in-person or online, so you can get quality therapy from the comfort of your own home, or with me right here in my office.

Anxiety treatment usually takes between 1-3 months, with each month providing drastic improvement. I can assess in a free call how many months it will likely take to get you your desired results.

What's included:

For more information regarding the RTT process, check out my services page here.

Let's do it!

Let’s find out why you’re anxious, understand your inner processes, unravel it all, clean out the clutter, and get you feeling fabulous! If you already know why you’re anxious, let’s process it and resolve it.

I want to learn directly from you; what anxiety is taking away from your life, how you want your life to be, how you want to feel, and what you would love to achieve for yourself. Whatever you tell me you want, that’s going to be our goal! I want to do that for you, and I want to get you there. If you’re not sure, let’s work together in untangling your thoughts and putting it into words.

Some goals might be: I’m ready to speak up for myself, I want to travel, to experience new things, to approach people I think I could be friends with, be more open, be myself, make a speech, say my opinions, contribute more at work, speak up during meetings, find a partner, drive a car, feel more confident, order food at a restaurant, take a class, start a new job, start my own business, board a plane, feel good in my own skin. The possibilities are endless!

Anxiety takes a lot away, but it doesn’t have to. Anxiety is not you, and it’s not a life sentence. You can be free from anxiety, free from medications, and free to be yourself. Living your life feeling peaceful, happy, calm and more you. It all starts with a free consultation. It’s completely free, with no obligation. I want you to feel good about who you’re working with, without any pressure or monetary investment. So let’s chat and see what we can do to get you living your best life!

Curious to learn more about what causes anxiety?

I’ve been working with anxiety for years, so of coarse I know some of the deeper reasons people form anxiety in the first place. I have a deep love for helping others, and a large part of that is sharing knowledge so we can all grow as individuals. This article is composed of real observations after working with hundreds of clients. Have a look at my article, the hidden secrets behind anxiety.